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Some Thoughts on Burnout

Note: If you love your job - truly love your job, and have excellent mental health - this post isn't for you unless you're managing people who don't.


OMFG.


I wrote the best post on burnout a couple months ago. I mean - it was fantastic. I sent it to friends and family. I shared it on LinkedIn. My friends shared it.


It really hit the mark. It helped people.


Then, a couple weeks ago, I changed website platforms and in my transfer of info/data, I missed that post.


I deleted the old site and all its data.


A few days later I was reviewing my new site and the post on burnout was NOT THERE!


Barf.



Let's talk about burnout. First I'll share my story...well, part of it.


My first corporate career lasted 24 years. The initial 20 were pretty alright. The last 4 were the sloggiest of slogs.


I led a team of amazing humans and that's what kept me going. I was 'reorged' with that team 7 times in the last 5 years of that career...reporting to as many different leaders.


I won national and international awards. I kept a team of learning & development professionals together and thriving for 14 years...a cost center that I had to fight to prove was valuable year after year even as we trained hundreds of thousands of customers.


I always got 5 out of 5 on my reviews. I was what is called a 'high performer'.


I was also miserable and exhausted all the time. I didn't know I was struggling with burnout. I thought I wasn't trying hard enough to be whatever it was that would make me feel valuable to the company.


Because there was always the undercurrent of 'everyone is replaceable'. Like a quiet hum or a low-grade fever.


Then my younger brother died and I resigned.


I was asked to stay on long enough to hire my replacement. (Pro-tip: say no...I didn't.) I left 3 months after I turned in my resignation.


My boss - who I'd reported to for a very short time - sent out the obligatory 'we wish you the best in all future endeavors' email and misspelled my last name. He also wrote about what a great smile I had and that I was great for a laugh. Nothing about the 24 years of my life I'd devoted to the company.


On the day I drove in to turn in my equipment - it was a beautiful day - I noticed how many cars were driving downtown...from their homes...to pay for parking...to spend their day making money for someone else.


And for the first time in 24 years, it seemed odd.


I parked, walked into the operations center, handed my equipment to a stranger and walked back out to my car.


That's how a 24 year corporate career ends. It was surreal.



7 years - and thousands of hours working with clients - later, I recognize burnout in a second. What I also see is that most people struggling with it, don't know they are.


They think they're not good enough or they aren't working hard enough.


That’s no accident. The system was built to protect itself, not the people doing the work.



Take a look at this list:


  • Brain fog - often mistaken for aging or early dementia

  • Difficulty concentrating - often mistaken for ADHD or poor focus

  • Irritability and mood swings - often mistaken for depression or a “bad attitude”

  • Cynicism or detachment - often mistaken for negativity or lack of motivation

  • Blunted emotions - often mistaken for depression

  • Chronic fatigue - often mistaken for thyroid issues, anemia, or poor sleep

  • Frequent headaches or migraines - often mistaken for neurological or vision problems

  • Digestive issues - often mistaken for food intolerances or IBS

  • Muscle tension or unexplained pain - often mistaken for arthritis, injury, or fibromyalgia

  • Weakened immunity - often mistaken for being “prone to illness” or poor hygiene

  • Procrastination and avoidance - often mistaken for laziness

  • Overworking without results - often mistaken for inefficiency or poor time management

  • Withdrawal from social life - often mistaken for introversion or social anxiety

  • Changes in appetite - often mistaken for dieting choices or emotional eating

  • Reliance on caffeine, alcohol, or sugar - often mistaken for harmless habits

  • Trouble falling or staying asleep - often mistaken for primary insomnia

  • Never feeling rested even after sleep - often mistaken for sleep apnea or poor sleep hygiene

  • Mid-day crashes - often mistaken for blood sugar dips or lack of fitness

  • Loss of passion or creativity - often mistaken for boredom or career mismatch

  • Questioning self-worth or competence - often mistaken for imposter syndrome


Those are some symptoms of burnout.



A client of mine recently decided to go on short-term disability for her mental health which was severely deteriorating. I knew her job was stressful but when she said, "Yeah, they finally transferred my workload to three guys."


Three guys. She was doing the work of three men. It doesn't matter that they're men...the work could have been transitioned to three women.


My client was doing the work of three humans. And she was blaming herself for not being good enough to keep up...while the company was fine with her carrying that workload.


Here's the dealio - we've been sold a bill of goods that is a buncha bullshit. You're not burning out.


You're being burnt out.


Budgets are ‘tight’ for you, but not for the CEOs making 290 times more. You’re expected to give up nights, weekends, even vacations and then carry the load when others leave. All reward for them, all sacrifice for you.


And somehow it’s on you to manage work-life balance? That’s absurd.


Meanwhile, you’re grinding yourself down, working harder and harder just to convince yourself you’re not failing. And when it all feels impossible, you don’t blame the system...you blame yourself.


It’s not you. It’s a system designed to serve executives and shareholders while treating employees and clients like an afterthought.


What can you do about it? Well, I left the grind and started helping people from outside the system.


If you can't leave, you can adapt and begin to give yourself the care you deserve. I don't mean self-care solves the problem - but it can't hurt.


Also, see the system. Know the system. You can learn to work within the system in a way that may feel better.


Here are some ideas:


  • Learn how to regulate your nervous system - this is life-changing & fairly accessible

  • Find a therapist - never hurts to talk to someone

  • Physical activity - even if you're just stomping up and down stairs...it makes a difference

  • TAKE YOUR PTO - and don't work while you're off

  • Put some boundaries around your working hours - start small if it's scary...leave an email unread until working hours.

  • Leave your work devices at work or put them in a drawer at home. Just because people can access us 24/7 doesn't mean we have to be available. You don't have to respond.

  • Prioritize your work and when you get assigned too much, ask your boss to prioritize their requests because YOU AREN'T A WIZARD WHO CAN BEND TIME.

  • Stop doing the work of 3 people. If there are gaps in the organization, let them be seen.


Sometimes, we don't speak up because we don't want to seem like we aren't a team player or we can't keep up. I want to give most leaders the benefit of the doubt and believe they do care about their workers so, speak up if it's an option. If it's not, I highly recommend getting curious about what other jobs are out there.



The focus today was on professional burnout but you can just as easily be burnt out by your personal life. I'll save that for another day.

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